What Makes You Smile?

This was the first question Cyrus's case manager asked at his last IFSP (Individual Family Service Plan - the preschool version of an IEP). Her exact words were, "What does he do that makes you smile?"

She's asked this question at pretty much every meeting, and quite honestly it was not a question that I particularly liked answering. Having attended dozens of IEP meetings as a teacher, the question is usually more along the lines of "What are the strengths of the child? Where is he successful?" and so the rephrasing it to the more gentle, "What makes you smile?" felt like an admission that he wasn't going to be successful or have strengths.

But this time, I was only delighted to answer - more than ready to gush about him. The honest answer to that question is incredibly simple. I love it when he is smiling! When he is laughing! I love it! I just eat it up. It somehow never gets old!

So that's when we're moving around and spinning in circles.

Or lately right when I come home and pick him up he will often grin right up at me! This is new!! And it is exciting!

Or when he's staring so attentively and interestedly at another child - usually a classmate or a cousin. Someone that he has come to recognize - he doesn't actually pay much attention to kids that he's only met once or twice.

Or watching his dad play or spend time with him. That never gets old either.

I mean really, this is the laughing giggling side of Cyrus that I wish everybody got to see. The one I feel compelled to share with everyone. It can be a bit tricky though, as usually he is most like this pretty early in morning before we've managed to get to anywhere, or in the evening about an hour or so before bed when we're usually at home again. Throughout the day he tends to be a bit more stoic. It has been suggested to me recently, that this timing may be do to his seizure meds, though I myself had not really made this connection. I just figured he was a night owl like his mother, and morning person like his dad. That the rest of the day was just sort've shrug worthy. Haha!

I don't even know why it is so important to me for others to see him like this. I know that I covet his smiles and giggles more than anyone else anyway. But still, insisting that we try to make him laugh while during visits with others - is my way of showing him off, of taking pride in who he is, or letting others see his true personality.

But Cyrus does not always cooperate.

I even commented to him once, that most people probably think I'm a liar when I say he is so incredibly happy most or a lot of the time because most people aren't around to see it.

And his face split into a huge grin and he immediately cracked up as if he found it incredibly amusing that I had taken so long to stumble onto his evil plan. He was laughing so hard and completely out of no where that I joined in, and then he laughed only harder and we had one of those truly rare times where he was just socially laughing, no spinning required.

And yeah, that just makes me smile!